梦到破灭再从头

爱是胸口用不尽的痛
一次深情一个伤口
春夏秋冬
付出是一种沉默
心是一场不放手的梦
一再破灭一再从头
花开花谢
试图永久
多少风和雨
斑剥着相约的角落
多少我和你
聚散泪和酒不堪回首
我的爱我的心
我从拥有到失去你
再握手又是别离
何时天长地久
梦的悲梦的喜
梦到破灭再从头起
再相逢多少狂喜
抵我一生的忧
多少你留下消息的港口
都有我

WHY? ? ?

From sweet relationship, to an infinite hurt to me and there goes the relationship of ours. Why? Why? Why? I ask keep on asking myself. Why do i get abandon always, why do i always bein leave behind. Like a football being kick here and there. I gave in so much yet she's just blind. And can fall into other guys heart while with me? Have she set herself apart what is right to do what is wrong to do. I've gave my advice, but just don't seem to be listening... You love you will listen you won't just hear. When u listen u will take into consideration, but when u just hear, is just the sound passing through your ears.

What did i do to make feel stress that she can't share with me? I'm i too serious...Of course i will be serious with the one i love, how can i play around. That will be puppy love isn't it. I came to pick her up from my house, also feel stressed?? Or when i oftenly buy the things she like and want.?? I know u worry for me. I know how to manage that why's i'm there and here to care for you. If not i won't come for you. Any girl want to find a guy which is not ready to take care of your everything...Ur finance, ur emotion, ur health....Of cuz u all would.Why stress?? There's nothing to stress abt. Just be by their, show them love and care. By thank you for ur everything, Love ya....A sincere sentence can make a guy recharged and go on for you. If you feel stress, i feel stress too that what am i gonna do. And i keep digging and digging. And the more i dig in, the more u stress...That's not the way...Why God gave us a pair hand for? To stand hand in hand for each other.

When she did something wrong as a girlfriend should not, i forgive her straightaway and comfort that moment she's crying, but when i done something wrong, she seems like tigeress so fierce, didn't msg or call me for days...Everyday just waiting for her call and msg. Is this how she gonna leave me alone forever? After how she did to me? holding a guys hand for few times behind me without my knowing. I wasn't happy at all. But i put aside and comfort her...Yes i know now i also have my wrong. That i stopped her friend frm going out so regularly...The reason why is that, i want her to call me or meet me out. Nowadays she seems to be sticking to her classmate so closely, that she totally forget abt me. That there is someone that love you that was hurt by is still waiting for ur call waiting for you. Doesn't she have the tot of calling me? Pls don't hesitate to call me. I'm here and always here....

痛的是我的真心

闭上眼睛忍住呼吸
暂时要和世界脱离
就快要学会不再想你
却听见不断跳动的心
我允许了你
让爱的自由还给你
我允许了自己
承受这悲伤到天明
我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许
我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提
总是以为终究化作云淡风轻
爱你到底痛了自己
我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许
我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提
所有结局在这夜里都已成形
爱到了底
痛的是我的真心

Fell....

Haiz....After two day of fighting against my fever and headache finally recovered this afternoon but then when i coming back hm from lunch i fell again... Hit my knees and its swollen. Worse thing is that my wounds on toe got bigger. Double the pain. Only myself know, who care who concern. Just limping my way back hm. Shit to this world.....

TireD!!!

Since last wednesday i was in the field having exercise training that last 8days. Move out of camp at 0000hrs reach the site at 0115. i get to sleep at 0235hrs and have to wake up at 0400hrs to get back to camp to pack ration for breakfast lunch and dinner as well. Racing against time every minutes. So tired...have to do this everyday...and 2nd night was having high fever....

Still a ordinary day....

Yesterday, 22 march 06 was my birthday...First wishing was from a girl just when clock strike 12midnight. For that moment i was smiling in my heart...then when morning came while i was sleeping calls kept coming and all was from my camp....And i received one msg frm my camp mate, he said one of my officer is coming down to my house to check me.(by the way i was not granted off on my birthday so i when to clinic and take a mc)
What organiztion is this? Birthday have to suffer, not off granted? this is bullshit, insane and inhuman organization. Very few of them rememnber my birthday, This year i didn't receive any present or calls... only one of my campmate msg me. That's all...
Then in the late afternoon i met up with a girl that i like. We went to watch movie, after movie then we took a stroll at the esplanade then i bring her back hm. Abt 11pm i reached hm. This is how i spent my birthday...Just like other ordinary day...

Now i don't aspect anymore things from others, it make me so hopeless.

Is you or u or just you....

Its been more than a year i've broke up a relationship with a girl. That's was most hurting one in my whole life. I've give her everything but she took for granted take me as something to lean for a while and leave. Whenever she wants something i try my best to get for her no doubt no matter how far. When she get it just to make her smile. Bring her to places and create romantic atmostphere. make her feel warm. all sorts of thing i've done to love her. But last she still decide to leave with all sorts reason. i don't wish to mention. Its all along im the one who is being there, doing a two person job to keep the relationship going and her mind keep thinking of other stuff. which i said 3minutes boiling water then became cold.

Why do i have suffer alone in a relationship with a girl is ain't willing. No. i don't want i don't wish. Anyone can feel this. Its been more than a year the scar in my heart is still wounded and open. Is not yet healed and sealed with love and care and understand. True love speaks of the truth and life. I have no problem being alone handle my own things. but in a relationship its not just one man show but both boy and girl, husband and wife are u working together, claps their hands walk through the storm. Whoever falls and tumble, one of them must have the will to shower him or her with love to get back on track. Always stand by your love ones' side. Don't ever put ur feeling as the most important and center of the relationship u will hurt ur love one....I just need someone to healed and sealed my wounded heart......I'm waiting......waiting.....

2006 I'm READY!!!

Hi everyone....
is 2006 plus 2. 2005 is gone...so much memory so much happy moment so much sad moment...
This year i'll release from national service will be coming out to the real world into a new phase of life... Gonna start planning for my future my career my girlfriend maybe become my wife....haha. There is so much to do to achieve. i can't wait for tomorrow to come and tomorrow's to come...This year hope to have a big celebration on my birthday... Wish to go ktv will my family and friends together to sing to them...that will be march 22nd oh...pls take note....
HAHA....ok...Just wanna wish u all a blessed year ahead...Be content of what u have...love ur family love ur friends and the special someone....maybe u can be the one who stand in gap for ur friend to show them warmth...Take care everyone.